Archive for September, 2011

Darkness to Light

There is water

The Al-Maghrib "Darkness to Light" class flyer that inspired me to write this post

It looks like a tunnel…

Or a well

There is a light at the end

The light has words

The words mean something

I learned them a lifetime ago and I know what they mean

But I didn’t know that I don’t understand them

It’s distressing to find out you knew but when you set out to act, you were left behind

Lack of belief or lack of Iman?

I don’t know but I continued on.

Forgetting sometimes yet repeating the words, I walked in darkness and called for light

Then He decided to give me the answer

I was walking along as I always do,

Asking, wondering, sinning, repenting, loving, fearing, hating, tired from myself, angry at myself

Finally, I jumped in.

The water weighed me down and I didn’t know how to swim.

I needed help but I started despairing.

Then I started calling…

I called in the evening, day, night, and morning.

I called in bed when I lay awake and I called when my eyes closed to tired sleep.

I called when the sun rose up and I started my day.

I called while bowing, prostrating, and doubting He was listening to me.

I called because it was too dark to see, the shapes were there but there was no conformity

I called because now my breath was too heavy and because the suffocation wouldn’t let me free

I called upon Him Who I knew was there and I tried to convince myself I wasn’t gone because I still cared.

I still cared for light even though I had electricity.

Because if the fuse blew out, how would I see?

Finally my calling began to give rise…

I saw the light at the end of the tunnel or the well or whatever it was. But I took a closer look-it wasn’t a means to get from point A to point B nor from up to down into a deep, black hole.

I was going up to the light-the darkness would finally leave me because…

“Allahu nur-us-samaawati wal ‘ard… -Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth. The example of His light is like a niche within which is a lamp, the lamp is within glass, the glass as if it were a pearly [white] star lit from [the oil of] a blessed olive tree, neither of the east nor of the west, whose oil would almost glow even if untouched by fire. Light upon light. Allah guides to His light whom He wills. And Allah presents examples for the people, and Allah is Knowing of all things.” (An-Nur-24:35)

Then I fell with my hands on the ground and remembered when Allah said He is Near, so I’ve no fear, and with affirmation to be sincere,

I’ll say the words loud and clear: “La ilaha illa Allah, Muhammad ur-Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam).”

September 26, 2011 at 2:04 am Leave a comment

Mistakes Made Simple

We all make mistakes in life. Do you remember the last time you did something that you regretted? Maybe it had to do with your inner self. Maybe it had to do with relations with others. Maybe it had to do with violating someone’s rights, or being unjust, or disobeying Allah.

Most of the mistakes we make in life can be atoned for. And only some can be forgotten. But none can be reversed. If something’s done, it’s done-you can’t do much about it.

When you disobey Allah, you must repent. When you violate someone’s rights, you must apologize and make it up to them. When you wrong yourself, well, again, you repent because you are an Amanah of Allah yourself.

Say, “O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah . Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.” (Az-Zumar-39:53)

In Ramadan, I wronged myself. I wrote a frustrating blog post titled, “Frustrated in Ramadan” and then a few days later, I was on suhaibwebb.com and I came across this post: http://www.suhaibwebb.com/personaldvlpt/character/spiritual-pitfalls-for-the-muslim-blogger/ and I learned blogging etiquettes! Can you believe that? It was amazingly, shockingly helpful. So I decided to remove my “Frustrated in Ramadan” post because it violated one of the points mentioned in the article. So the lesson learned was that I made a mistake and I was able to atone for it. And although I am not reversing the process, I kind of am because I’m removing the post but then people still read it so I’m not really reversing it…oh well, you get the point!

So remember, when you make a mistake in life, there’s always a way to fix it and learn from it. Humans are not immune to mistakes and Allah is Ar-Raheem, (the Most Merciful).

btw, Surah Az-Zumar became my new favorite surah at the moment. Any surah that I read and/or listen to in times of difficulty or frustration becomes my new favorite surah. That’s kind of what happened with Surah Az-Zumar and its recitation by Mishary is just breathtaking-subhanAllah!

So long until next time when I find something else interesting to share!

Wassalam=)

September 10, 2011 at 6:12 pm Leave a comment


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